Why would someone favortie a story of mine where it is quite clear that it hasn't been updated in years and because the last posted chapter has no reviews the connection would be obvious and then not leave a review?  Didn't you think that maybe, just maybe the author didn't update because the last posted chapter didn't garner any comments?  Favorting and following are all very nice but comments are the main point of posting.  So why wouldn't you leave a review?  If you like the story, wouldn't you want it to be updated and finished?  Did you maybe think about writing a comment to help that along?  I don't get it.

So, It Didn't Really

I just jumped the gun.  I did actually get more reviews for the Grey's story.  So much so that I'm now posting and writing another multi chapter and have done two versions of a one shot.  Why two?  Because I misplaced the notebook the story was written in and so since it was a one shot, I just re wrote it.  Then I found it again so I posted both.

I am enjoying the new fandom.  I still wish for an Andromeda revival but this is still nice.
Valentine, Beka

My Greys Story Tanked

I finished it and got a grand total of one review.  Fred will add his when he finally catches up.  He doesn't watch the show but he's reviewing for me.  So, I kept two readers, only one of whom actually watches.  What a comedown!

I tried so hard to write a good an entertaing story but I guess I failed.  I lost most of my auidence.  It was suggested that was maybe because they didn't resonate as Addison and Derek.  In other words, out of character.

That did shake me up a bit.  In all my years writing fanfiction, I never got that.  In fact, I was once told I was pretty good at keeping characters in character.  But to each their own and what is OOC for one person may be IC for another.

All I know is I'm so hurt.  I've been missing the heyday of Beka fandom.  Back whern we Beka writers supported each other.  Back when we would read and review each others stories.  Back when I could log onto Ex Isle and find an updated Beka fic every night.

I thought I had found that again with Addison fandom.  But I was wrong.  So now I cry.  
Valentine, Beka

Nothing Better To Do

Which makes it sound like I dislike writing in this.  I don't.  I'm still in a bad mood.  It has been such a long time since I've done two entries this close together.  I used to make lots more once upon a time, so closely spaced.  But things change and part of the reason to post here is for comments which I barely get anymore.  So, it's like, why bother?

But I still feel so sad, angry and hurt ove the lack of reviews that I wanted to do more whining.  So, here I am.

We are also without a car right now due to Fred having totalled it.  Not on purpose.  So, we have to walk everywhere or get rides.  This sucks and doesn't help my mood.  But whatever.
  • Current Mood
    depressed depressed

More Whining

So perhaps it wasn't the smartest move to update a fic on Christmas Day but I felt so bad after being locked out of the Internet by a computer virus that I wanted to give my readers an update to show I cared.  As it turns out, I needn't have bothered.  No one was anxiously awaiting an update.  No one cared.  No reviews.

Oh, I got subscibers and favotites which is nice but nothing means as much to me as reviews.  So screw them all.  Can't bother to leave a review.  Then I can't be bothered to update.

I did get a review to my latest Charlie's Angels story.  That was nice.  I will work on the next chapter of that.  Sure it's only one review but one was always my minimum requirement to update.  Sure, I would love more.  Who wouldn't?  But I got my reqirememnt fulffilled and so there it is.  I am a woman of my word.  I said one review was all I needed and so I will update.
  • Current Mood
    aggravated aggravated
Valentine, Beka

Still Sad

I got one review for the story I was talking about yesterday.  I'm happy about that.  But it's quite a comedown from the fourteen I got for the first chapter.

I knew I wasn't going to keep that pace up.  I also know I won't keep all my readers all the way to the end.  But it still hurts.

I will still update because one review does meet my minimum requirement to update but I'll be sad about it.

I also miss comments here.  I was going through my front page entires and I have hardly any comments.  Most have zero comments.  That is sad.

I'll still update as I feel like it because I still think LJ beats Facebook but I sure do wish people besides me were reading this.
  • Current Mood
    sad sad
Valentine, Beka


My latest chapter of my fan fic in my newest fandom has garenered no reviews.  This naturally depresses me.  It's not wrong for me to want comments.  It's not wrong for anyone to want comments.

I could ask Fred to review and he would and then my requirement of at least one review to update would be met but what is the fucking point?  People have favorited it and subscribed to it but news flash!!!!!   If no one leaves me a comment than I'm not updating.  I've left stories on fanfiction .net unfinished for years, even though they are finsihed at Ex Isle because no one bothered to review the last chapter posted.  I feel no guilt about this.  If people want to read more than they can jolly well leave a comment.  It doesn't have to be a whole story, just say if you liked it or not.

If this site were still as active as it once was this would be the cue for people to berate me in comments about how I should write for myself and writing for reviews is so fucking wrong.  It's not.  If I was writing only for me I would never post.  I'm writing because I want to hear what people have to say about my stories, good and bad. 
  • Current Mood
    depressed depressed
Valentine, Beka

A Shipper Complaint

So for once my complaint about fandom has less to do with me and is more of a general rant. Although, I've gotten reviews like this if I'm remembering correctly.

Anyway, with regards to shipper pairings, it seems people just can't live and let live. Well, some anyway. They feel the need to go into stories that are clearly a different pairing than their OTP and bitch about it and insult the author for daring to ship differently than they do.

I mean come on. Ge the fuck over it. You don't own any given fandom or the world and you sure as hell can't force people to ship what you ship. Just ship who you ship and leave others who ship differently than you alone.

This is not to say you can't passionately love your OTP with the fire of a thousand suns. I love Beka and Season 1 Dylan, Vincent and Catherine, House and Cameron and Addison and Derek with that kind of passion. With the exception of Vincent and Catherine, which is pretty much the only ship in the B and B fandom, since the show was all about them and their love, the pairings I love are all second place ships.

Beka and Dylan came in second to Beka and Tyr and later Beka and Rhade. House and Cameron are second place to House and Cuddy and Addison and Derek are second place to Meredith and Derek. But the first place shippers of those always seem to have to come into the second place shipper stories to tell us how wrong we are and insult us for shipping who we ship.

We are not wrong for shipping who we ship. We have reasons for shipping that are just as valid as yours. But we can ship passionately and ignore what we don't ship. Because we are mature people and not assholes. Maybe some of the first placers could learn a little something from us. What a novel idea!
  • Current Mood
    pissed off pissed off
Valentine, Beka

Beka Day

Missed posting on it this year. But now I am. And I've forgiven Fred or not updating. I still wish he would but you know. I do still wish someone would. Oh, well.

If Fandoms Weren't All Alike

Well, they aren't, not really.  Except for one thing.  No matter which fandom I get into there are always unfinished stories.  It sucks.

And Fred isn't updating again this year.  He didn't say that when I asked him but his silence told the story.  I'd love to be wrong but I won't be.

Merry fucking Christmas to me.